When we talk about forgiveness, it is usually the desired state of being after a particular event, person, or situation in life. What we are missing in the conversation about forgiveness is a very important element: self-forgiveness.
In this episode I talk about the importance of forgiving yourself and why is it so necessary when it comes to healing and moving on. Just as we can feel and experience pain because of the actions of others, so too can we feel trapped or burdened because of the own emotional weight that we are carrying within ourselves.
We are in the process of healing, moving forwards, and ultimately letting go of any and all resentments, we look and place the blame outsides of ourselves. We look for something to blame because that's what we think forgiveness requires of us: a definitive hurt and a definitive person or situation that shall be forgiven.
But what happens when we fail to see that the person who is actually causing us pain is ourselves? There comes a time when we must take an honest inventory of ourselves. To look at ourselves fully and completely, and to acknowledge the hurt that we have caused ourselves (and may still continue to cause). Without doing so, we will hold onto pain and hurt while still trying to point the blame outwardly, where forgiveness is not to be found.
Like the first step of anything, we must first acknowledge it. We must acknowledge the pain that we have caused ourselves and be truthful about the hurt we have experienced because of our own thoughts, actions, and beliefs.
But remember in this process, approach yourself with patience, love and especially compassion. Because those are the things that we have long deprived ourselves of. Those are the things that we so freely give to other people but when it comes time to tend to our own garden, we come up short. Some of the most damaging things that we experience are the injuries that we inflict upon ourselves. The wounds may appear subtle, simply because we have become accustomed to them, but they run deep.
Self-forgiveness can be difficult, because sometimes we can only see the parts that we are falling short, the parts of ourselves that we feel aren’t good enough for anyone else, including ourselves. We have become so accustomed to searching for the negative within ourselves that self-forgiveness can seem impossible because it isn’t something that we feel isn't deserved.
I hope you enjoy and remember to approach yourself with patience, understanding, and love. You deserve the healing and forgiveness that you seek.
If these words have helped you, please share this post in order to help spread love and healing to someone else who may need it.